Out Of The Shadows: eaJ On Accepting The Past And Being Honest In His Latest EP

It takes a whole lot of courage and humility to be honest with yourself and admit that you’re wrong; and it takes a whole lot more to do that in front of a community of people who have relentlessly supported you — just ask eaJ.

In his newly released EP, when the rain stopped following me, the Korean-American singer-songwriter — who is also known as Jae Park — pulled back the curtain and let fans into his untold moments of healing and self-discovery. From his turbulent departure from K-pop to finding a new sense of purpose as a soloist, the record chronicles a pivotal moment in eaJ’s personal and artistic journey, one he’s incredibly excited to share with the world. 

When the rain stopped following me tells the story of a boy who has a rain cloud following him — a character he came up with friend and webtoon author, Jjolee. 

“She had me as a character in one of her webtoons, we became close over that and with her help, I had an idea of a guy that has a rain cloud just following him, it’d appear out of nowhere and disappear as if nothing ever happened,” eaJ explains to Billboard Philippines. 

This character — who eaJ insists is separate from himself (“It’s not me, it’s just some random guy,” he says) — takes inspiration from the fact that it’d always be raining whenever he performs. 

“It’s funny, because every time I’ve had a tour ever — this dates all the way back to 2021 when I did my first festival, so, for the past four years, every time at a festival or a concert, it was raining,” he explains. 

“And so, when I was trying to figure out what my next concept was, I was like, what if there’s a character and this rain cloud that comes over him? That’s where the idea stemmed from.”

While the concept is inherently whimsical and light-hearted, depicting a guy who “showers with no water so his water bill is zero and waters his lawn by just walking through it, because the rain’s coming down constantly”, the EP sees eaJ at his most vulnerable. 

When the rain stopped following me comes as the long-awaited follow up to eaJ’s insomnia trilogy, both in regards to his releases and his personal story. 

“If insomnia was looking back on the time period of me leaving DAY6 up until that point, this is a story about my path when I was going [through a lot] up until last year. So, it’s a more recent story,” eaJ explains. 

The record, which spans six tracks, unpacks what the last couple of years looked like for the “Car Crash” hitmaker. As one would expect, it took a lot of reflection and growing for eaJ to pour his heart and soul into these songs, having to come to terms with his past mistakes.

“It’s kind of scary, but it’s cool,” he says. “It’s scary because in order for me to be honest about sharing what the songs are about, I have to admit that there’s fault, that I was faulty.”

This is most apparent in his single with salem ilese, “burn.” Written in the perspective of God talking to eaJ, the alt-pop track talks about setting fire to something that could have been so beautiful.

“I wrote that subconsciously in the perspective of God talking to me at the end of [2022] because I asked for a lot of things, and he gave me everything that I asked for but my ego and vanity got the best of me,” eaJ explains.

“And then he said, ‘Hey, it’s time to burn like I love you, but you’re gonna have to learn.’ It’s hard to say those kinds of things out loud because I have to admit that I messed up.”

While his track “right where you left me” comes as his most revealing track yet, with eaJ walking his audience through one of the lowest points in his life. 

“I’ve never gone this deep, but I will go up to here. I left that relationship because I was at the low— I know it’s really corny when people are like, ’I’m at the lowest point in my life’, but I have never been that close to so many dangerous thoughts. I just couldn’t love anyone else, because I couldn’t love myself,” shares eaJ.

He continues, holding back tears, “I just couldn’t deal with anything. I didn’t want to hear anything. I canceled all my sessions. I left, and then I realized things; I got back on LexaPro and felt better, and I came back, and they were… they were right there, where I left them.”

To contextualize everything, when the rain stopped following me dates back to the tumultuous start of eaJ’s solo career, one he admits was lined with mistakes, anger, and immaturity. It’s a time in his life he doesn’t address too often, frequently referring to it with an air of vagueness — not necessarily by choice, but out of respect to his fans. 

“For a long time after I left DAY6, I kind of [stepped] away from the band, so I tiptoed around it,” eaJ explains. “I just didn’t want to step on any toes, and make fans upset. I just wanted to give them space, because I felt like I’d done so much damage to them, whether I meant it or not, and it just felt bad.”

So, while when the rain stopped following me is a step in a new sonic direction for eaJ, he also wants the record to be a cathartic end to a chapter well lived. 

“There’s a song on the EP called ‘i just want my 20s back’ that I think will give people [some] perspective,” he says. “It kills me that there’s so many things that I can’t say that would make everything make a lot more sense; but I believe everything comes in due time. So I think ‘I just want my 20s back’ gives a piece of where my head’s at with that.”

Without wanting to say too much, eaJ continues, “The thing is I’ve had closure. I don’t think other people have had, and I’ve been seeing things that really f**king breaks my heart. But, as long as that gives them closure, then I’m okay with it. I’m just going to speak my truth, and I just want to keep going forward.”

eaJ just wrapped up his tour around Asia in celebration of his EP, performing in Manila, Jakarta, Bangkok, Singapore, Kuala Lumpur, and Seoul. And like he’s always done it for his solo career, the tour comes as the product of hard work and relentless effort as an independent artist. 

“It’s hell,” he says succinctly when asked what it’s been like putting together a tour independently.

He continues, “I was very immature when I left K-pop because I was under the impression [that] I’m going to be able to do all these things that I wanted to do. Little did I know that they had been busting their ass, working to get things done that I never even knew about. 

So, I [have] a new-found appreciation for a lot of the back end stuff, like whether that’s back lining for tour, that’s routing, whether that’s figuring out how the money’s going to last, or that’s even having funding.”

Looking back on his career as a soloist so far, eaJ shares it’s been a rollercoaster ride where the lows are low and the highs are absolutely incredible. 

“I think my friend vaultboy said it the best. They said, ‘You may not be getting the same results that you want, or you might not be getting the number of streams, but at least you know that you are doing it’,” he shares, adding that he’s not discrediting what other artists have done. 

“I’m doing this myself, so it makes me proud of my wins, and I’m learning. I’m learning more and more.”

While he’s no longer in the world of K-pop, he’s navigating his solo career with so much of what he’s learned during his time in the industry. From the work ethic to the resolute dedication, he owes a lot to his time as a K-pop idol.

“I feel like there’s this misconception that a lot of people think that I don’t like K-pop artists. But, okay, hear me out: If you’ve ever been a trainee and been in K-pop, there is no way you can’t recognize the hard work and the work ethic that it takes to be on that stage,” eaJ shares. 

“It’s impossible. I know that because I’ve been there and I did that. I owe a lot to that era in my life. That was a time in my life where I buckled down and my main drive was, ‘I’m doing this for my future’. I’m gonna put my head down, I’m gonna keep working. I’m gonna keep pushing for this team, this band. I still keep very strong and try to hold on to that work ethic. I think that takes me a long way.”

With a sincere gratitude for everything that comes his way and raw artistry that continues to captivate audiences, there’s no doubt that eaJ is set to go far. 

When asked what he wants to accomplish in the next couple of years, he shares that while topping a Billboard chart and gaining streams would be a dream, he ultimately wants to move people with his music. 

“If I can make them feel anything at all while listening, it doesn’t even have to be the emotion that I want them to feel but if I can make them feel anything at all, I feel like I’ve succeeded,” he says.

“Just more of that, and I think that’ll fulfill my life.”

_{Photographed by Jerick Sanchez. Creative Direction by Nicole Almero. Styling by Kurt Abonal. Glam team by Nix Institute of Beauty: Hair by Leigh David. Makeup by Kai Balbin. Photography assisted by Karl Reuven Rimando, Roniel Justine Sanez, Dave Orpilla, and Buddy Reyes. Story by Franchesca Judine Basbas.}

_{Shot at PioneerX Studios.}